who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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