i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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