this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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