The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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