So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
