How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
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