Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize