were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
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