Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
