Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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