All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
