That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
