I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
