Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
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