Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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