I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I am spending my child support on dildos
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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