can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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