Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
you made out with another girl for some wings
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
