I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
