no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
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They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
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I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.