You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize