remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
