it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Do you have feelings for this penis?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize