im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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