shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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