what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
