i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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