:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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