I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
