bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
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She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
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diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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