This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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