Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
It was like getting head from an anaconda
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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