I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize