So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
