margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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