Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
We just shotgunned beers for America
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
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