she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
