I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I don't deserve a penis
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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