Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
