is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
