i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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