I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
how does that bad decision feel?
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize