We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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