Well apparently he's into motor boating.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
