Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
