I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
