I can tuck mytits in my pants
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
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