So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
