Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
