I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
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He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
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I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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